In the in between.

I touched a bit on my last post saying that other people do not understand my life. I lost another friend. We were close..but I can't and shouldn't choose between two people I love and care for. I'm not gonna lie..it hurts to not have many people to talk to anymore. I left public school in september of '09 and graduated january of 2010. But when I left..I noticed less and less people trying to contact me. It was and is almost as if they don't understand how I live. I'm a mom. A great mom. I love Cayle and I would do absolutely anything for him. I take care of all his needs before my own. It could be eleven o'clock at night before I take a shower or I eat something or I do what I need to. But do I mind.? Of course not. I enjoy it. Lately it feels like I'm in the in between. I'm between schools. I graduated high school. I chose not to go to prom. I chose not to participate in the graduation ceremony either. I start hair school in the fall. I'm in between un-employment and employment. I'm trying to find a job. I think I might've found one. I still want to make time for Cayle and Adam. I've promised them both I would. I want to make friends at this job. I want to work hard at this job to be able to do more for Cayle. I'm very fortunate to have all the help I do. But Cayle is my child. I want to do everything I can for him. I think it's a time in my life for new people. All my old high school friends have left. People who were friends out of school have left. I think this is a fresh start in the making. I have Cayle and Adam. And a few good friends left. I'm thankful I do have some teen moms to meet and get to know a little better. I'd like to. And I have Christina. She's always been there for me. And I wanna be there for her too. I guess come whatever may at this point. As long as I have the people who matter..I'll be okay.