Heh..

So I just felt like posting to for no apparent reason..just to get everything off my mind I guess. School has been rough. Last Thursday was the worst. I had a client who wanted a roller set and her hair would not curl for ANYTHING. I felt horrible..like I'm not cut out for hair dressing. And a lot of the other girls make me feel like CRAP. They're so thin and snobby and yet they're gorgeous and I feel so plain standing next to them. Sad but true. I'm sick of doing hair and not making tips off of it. Granted..thats not what its about but at least when I make a dollar or something it lets me know I did a good job. And I dont even know how to make small talk or to start conversations with people. I get so concentrated doing their hair I completely forget to say anything. And to make things worse..I think someone stole from me at school..not money surprisingly..but finger nail polish. Pardon my French here but why the hell would you steal nail polish.???? Its two freaking dollars a bottle.!!! If you're that bad off I feel sorry for you to be honest. Ugh.! I'm not mad about what's missing. I'm mad about the fact it is missing. The one thing I cannot stand is a common theif. And half these girls at school are spoiled little rich girls and their daddies give them everything and anything they ask for. WTF.!!?!? I just really dread going..but even though I hate it..i stay every night and I do my class work. I know it's the only way I can get my life to fall into place. I want to be able to provide for not only myself but my family. I wanna be able to have my dream wedding and be able to fall asleep with Adam every night and wake up with him every morning. I wanna be able to buy my dream car (dodge charger). I wanna buy my own house. I wanna give Cayle amazing birthdays and Christmases every year. And I just feel stuck in hair school. Thats it..stuck. I dont even know what to say about it anymore. I don't get enough practice..and I just go to sit there. I need some motivation..or at least a reason to like it. I love doing hair but the school is crap. The end. Felt good to rant about that. I think I need more books to read..but I like to read about 'raw' topics i.e. drug abuse/addiction, LGBT books, eating disorders, mental disorders, suicide..etc. And not many books are out there like that. My favorite authors are Julie Anne Peters and Ellen Hopkins. And I can't find any books that honestly amount to theirs. Any suggestions.? You know what I've noticed.? It's easier to be friends with people who have kids or that have an extreme passion for them. I have to let go of several friends who don't get it. And one who makes me extremely mad. We were friends for six years and after I got pregnant I saw less and less of her. And every time I try to say 'lets put in the effort and be friends' I never hear from her. And I just got fed up with it and I havent heard from her in well over 6 months. Last time I saw her she wanted a free hair cut. Cayle was eight months old. He is now 14 about to be 15 months old. I don't txt her. And I deleted her off my Facebook. And she hasnt even noticed.I wanna lose weight..and I need a fun way to do it. Like a dance video game or something. I know it sounds lame..but I think the Michael Jackson wii game looks like fun. Too bad I cant afford it. Ha. Maybe for my birthday...too bad its in March. I took Cayle to the park today. This kid LOVES the slide.!! He had so much fun. Too bad it was crowded. Ah well.. vbdfjbvfkfk;l that is all.